+ *_____ m3m0rii3s of m0ii ` ` +

Tuesday, December 25, 2007 @ 11:29 PM

whee! had an enjoyable christmas eve last night!

went to church for caroling. Firstly, we went to jiaqi's hse; my moon moon de hse. xD

we sang christmas songs.. and after tat i went into moon moon's room and get the thumbdrive from her. cos i wanted to download Priston Tale, and i cant load in my comp.

we ate the food prepared by moon moon's mummy. hahas! her bro, shengjie is so lame lor.. treated me like little kid. trying to trick me with the cards. hahas! but i nv got tricked! =p

after tat, we went off to the 2nd hse le. while going out, moon moon's mummy gave as a gift as a token of appreciation. hehe. =D

the 2nd hse we going to was Jiayi's grandpa's hse. The hse was damn big, with 3 stories. Jiayi's hse was juz as big, as they are juz neighbours of each other. rich nehh. =)

tis was when our "highness" started. we started to get more and more "high" after singing all the christmas songs. we ate while crapping. we even sang songs which are unrelated to christmas/christian. after tat we decided to sing the hymn which we always sing with actions de. den we sang while doing those actions! hahas! and tis goes on and on.

when we went off, the owner oso gave us something as a token of appreciation. =D

while walking towards the bus, we sang again. in the bus back to church, we oso sang. when we walked up to our church's sanctuary, we oso sang while walking in, den ppl inside all looked back at us. hahas! =X

really happy and i really enjoyed myself! i'm really glad to have those brothers and sisters! and i'm really proud to be a christian myself! i really love to be with them, and i'm looking forward to our fellowship camp on 28th dec! hehes. =)

Sunday, December 9, 2007 @ 2:08 AM

ok, now everything's back to normal. God has healed both of our hearts, and led us walked out of the Devil's hand. We're fine now. Thank God. Praise the Lord! =D

Friday, December 7, 2007 @ 7:20 AM

who can tell me wat to do? God, please help me... i'm breaking down soon.. =(

why is my heart so painful?

i've been ignoring jp for 2 days. he called, i nv pick up. he sms-ed, i nv reply. he msn me, i oso nv reply. i'm really over-doing it. and now i really regretted.

i am going to lost another fren. he said after the sms, i need not hear from him again.

tat obviously mean tat we're not even frens le. i feel really sad now. while walking to school, i even cried. i dunno why is my heart so pain, and it's all my fault. i started it first. i started to ignore him. but juz after i wanted to talk to him, he said tis to me.

wat else can i do? i onli can accept tis truth.

all the joy and happiness we shared.. all vanished at once.. juz because of a Club..

since he wanted tis, i shall respect his decision ba. i tink i shouldnt bother him either.. May God bless him.. ='(

Wednesday, December 5, 2007 @ 4:29 PM

i'm so angry! so angry with myself! last night Jin Peng called. at first we were fine. talking abt the bbq pit, and wat day should it be.

but our topic drifted away, and we talked abt astro club le. he said everything he was doing himself. nobody's helping him. blaming the rests of the committee saying we all not committed enough. blablabla.. den he said i did NOTHING for the club. NOTHING LEH! so wat's the blog doing there? fake? i spent my time making the blogs. even i had not finished doing my PP poster. which is more important than any other stuff.

i've had enough of it le. from the beginning, i NEVER thought of being a committee in the club, i SAID i wan to be just a MEMBER. JP made EVERY decision himself! and without my concern, he put me in the post of Assistant Secretary. and i've told him i wanna quit b4, but he asked me not to quit. so i dragged till now.

and now, i told him i want to be juz a member, and do not want to be in the committee. he asked to confirm again. and i said "confirmed". and i saw his msn nick saying: "Problem/Crisis reveal the real you!" and i knew he was referring to me. wat real me? i had always be myself. i helped to make the blog, taught him how to use the codes, prayed for the club. and wat did i get in return? he said i did NOTHING!

he thought wat ar.. everybody will be like him? i know he's very good in leadership. but not everyone will have this leadership in them. obviously he NEVER think of other ppl's feeling! how selfish! i really do not have the experience of being a committee myself, so i do not noe wat a committee need to do. although i did not help physically, i did help spiritually! and he didnt appreciate them.

ok, i'm not blaming him, just blaming myself. It's all my fault to agree him to join this club from the beginning. If i hadnt join this club, all these problem will not arise. now i've already quit as a committee. i will quit this club COMPLETELY! and i've made this very clearly to myself. i dun want to be involve in anything related to him ever again!

and i've learned a lesson from this. NEVER be nice to anyone, cos they will take advantage of you. when you want to quit, they will start blaming you. So i will not be nice and soft-hearted to anyone again! i will commit to NOTHING besides Christ. and i mean NOTHING!